I have a feeling that forgiveness of self is the most essential way to actually be able to forgive others. You have to do, you. First. Which none of us really wants to acknowledge, or do. We think it is up to others to make the forgiveness complete.
Nope. It doesn’t work like that. We have to see how and why things unfolded for our spiritual growth and evolution and maturation. We have to know deeply why we choose to put ourselves in those situations, where we ended up being hurt.
This does not mean that anything the other person did was right. Hell no. You just no longer allow that pain and hurt to constrict you. And hold you back.
You deserve to be free of that suffering. Freedom, is in your hands my friends.
Why would you ever wait on someone to say I am sorry before you forgive. Ain’t no body got time and space for that. The person that needs forgiveness is you. Every situation we end up in is a result of our own choices. We must own it.
Sucks doesn’t it? Ya. It really does. We gotta own it all, though.
You may have handed over the gun to someone knowing full well they are not compassionate and non-empathetic. Forgive yourself. You may have put yourself in a situation you knew deep down would not be good for you. You knew. You knew he wasn’t right for you. You knew that person shouldn’t have been in your life. You knew. Forgive yourself for that. The thing is, we blame these people who we trusted wouldn’t hurt us again. Yet we put ourselves in those situations. So it is YOU, my dear friends, who need to hear I am sorry, from your own damn self. Your own, beautiful and divine self. Do you even see yourself, as Divine and beautiful? It’s time too. And start acting like it, too. Forgive yourself for not.
The best apology, is changed behaviour. So show UP for yourself. AS, yourself. Show yourself, what you are made of.
You are made of so much more than anything anyone has made you feel to believe, or even what your negative thoughts have you believe. Forgive yourself for believing anything but the truth. And forgive yourself for not speaking and acting in your truth. You can start now. Speak as your higher self would have you speak. People might not like it. These people, will adjust. You’re not here to please. You’re here to serve.
When there is resentment, anger, hate and every other negative emotion running through your veins when you think of a person, do not seek to forgive them. It can be to hard on you. Seek to forgive yourself for allowing yourself to feel those emotions. Acknowledge and thank these emotions for showing yourself how deep you love. Seek to love yourself a little harder. Do not get caught up in control and how you wish they knew how to love you. Do not get caught up in how dare they and why and how did this happen. Get close to the Divine instead, and ask spirit to cleanse you of all those negative and stagnant energies. Cut the cords, energetically, with these people immediately. Do not allow yourself to live in hate. Rise above and raise your vibration frequency so that you may attract more loving and inspiring experiences.
Your job to “move on” does not lie in waiting on apologies.It does not lie in “time heals all wounds”. It does not lie in hoping they admit they were wrong and you were right. Moving on, forgiveness, lies in you. It is you who has the power to actually move on. You shan’t depend on someone to come up to you to say, I am sorry for all the hurt and pain I’ve caused you. Or hope that they will voice the mistakes you feel they made. Take the lessons and the love and be done with it. Of course, feel everything that you feel needs to be felt. Take care of you diligently when it is all so raw and fresh and deeply painful. You feel that. And when you feel ready, take the time to understand how you got there.
And then forgive yourself.
That is all you need to do. The easiest way to build a new energy and relationship with someone who has hurt you, is to forgive yourself. You can say that, by forgiving yourself, you automatically forgive others.
And when you have forgiven yourself, and feel balanced and open, you can decide whether to walk away from said people or move forward with them. Forgiving yourself, means not bringing up the past, and asking why. No you do not need a conversation about what happened. If you have forgiven yourself, you know why, and that part has been acknowledged, heard and healed. You already know why. It was for your evolution and for you to grow and learn. This is where we let it go, and we speak only our truth.
If you have forgiven, you have acknowledged the lessons and healed the wounds that your soul had planned for you. Sometimes we feel healed so much we want to let those that have hurt us back in, but remember that even if you do feel solid about yourself, your intuition is your strongest guide on making these bold decisions.
Trust yourself. And remember you have a choice.
Be gentle with yourself. And find kindness for yourself.
If you were hurt as a young child, forgiving yourself may not be what is needed. I feel the best way to move forward is to be guided to love yourself, really hear and listen to your intuition, ask for what you need and set boundaries with people. The best way to release all that pain is to transcend those deep feelings into the light so you may feel the love you deserve. Forgiving the person who put you in those circumstances may come from you being your true and best self. You don’t condone anything, but you do set yourself free from being a victim of someone else’s choices that you had no control of. Because sometimes our choices are definitely limited, especially as children.
Forgiveness can come in different forms. Such as what I mentioned about our childhood. If we feel that experiences were out of our control, then the next best thing is to honor ourselves, and act with integrity. Let go of control of outcomes and others. Decide what you value and what your morals are and stick to your standards. Find your tribe. Surround yourself with like minded people only. Forgiveness is not just about saying I am sorry. It is about creating peace within. Harmony within. Honoring yourself. Making your dreams a reality. It is about confidence within, without all the fancy clothes and makeup on. It is taking care of your body, mind, soul, and heart. It is about profound healing, from cellular level, and emotional wounds past on from generation to generation. It is about getting to a place of love for life and ourselves on a deep level.
It seems we actually allow ourselves to sit in hurt and pain and suffering hoping those that hurt us will make it better again.
Well. It doesn’t work like that. You may never hear the words I am sorry. You may never feel that they are actually sorry, even when they are. The work is on you. Within, you. It is not up to them to make you believe that they are sorry. It is up to you to trust your intuition. If you do not believe, then maybe they are not meant for you.
Letting people go can be one of the most heart wrenching things we do. But sometimes it is necessary, in order for us to attain the true peace and success we desire.
Sometimes we hold on to others so tightly that we forget about our Divine mission. We live for others, we feel obligated to others, we think they need us, but yet they are hurting us.
These are choices you make. What we allow, continues.
It is time to forgive and not let any of that bullshit, we accept from others and ourselves, happen again.
It is time to shine your bright mother fucking light, and feel forgiveness deep within your soul, so that you may feel free to be who you are.
Let us find gratitude for where we are, and how we got here. Find the gratitude. It’s important, too.
Forgiveness starts with you. You, you, you.
Me, me, me.
And you know this. You just forgot.
Forgive yourself, and that is it.